"Residents in the club-centric hub of the Lower East Side are raising a stink over the manure minefield they're forced to navigate after NYPD horses do their duty to disperse rowdy bar-hoppers every weekend," reports the NY Post in an article that contains exactly one quote from a LES resident. But no matter! The tabloid's reporters noticed some horse manure while out and about in neighborhood over the weekend, and that's good enough to run a horseshit story headlined, "Party poopers: Clubland fumes at coppers' ploppers."
To back-up their lede about "residents raising a stink," the Post cites one Fabio Jimenez, a "longtime resident" who explains, "I asked the cops, and they said it was biodegradable. It's unfair that people have to pick up after their dogs, but the cops don't have to pick it up!" Then the Post cites a bouncer, a grocery store employee ("They should be responsible for their poop"), and two partiers from Jersey, who do not disappoint. "They are intimidating," opines Anthony Iarossi of Jersey City, in defense of the mounted unit. "Wars were won based on cavalry." And the LES is certainly at war... with B&T weekend warriors like Iarossi!
Members of the NYPD mounted unit were deployed to the neighborhood in January after locals complained about rowdy revelers flooding the streets when the bars closed. According to the Post, the unit brings a bucket for the poop when patrolling parades, but not when policing drunken shitheads on the LES. And so local everyman Fabio speaks for all when he says the neighborhood is tired of getting dumped on. Not to take anything from Fabio, but what this story really needs is a quote from Viane Delgado.
