A 5-year-old's birthday party ended in something worse than tears—blood!—when a group of gunslingers opened fire near a crowd of record industry folk, hitting two. According to the Post: "Sources said the East Manor mansion in Woodside had been rented by a rapper who goes by Ke$ha Lewis but is unrelated to the pop singer of the same first name." (Hmm.) Whoever's party it was, it went late. Around 6 a.m. the remaining guests were standing outside the Queens event space, several of them having a heated argument. One pulled out a firearm and started shooting. The perp and his friends, who were also armed, hit one guest in the back and one in the leg. Then they started firing at a yellow Lamborghini parked nearby, because why not?

The gunmen shot numerous times into the $125,00 convertible, breaking its windows, though thankfully no one was inside. They went on to target a second Lamborghini parked a short distance away. Elmhurst Hospital says the two shooting victims are in stable condition, but no word so far on the mysterious, luxury car-hating thugs. As of last night no motive was known.