Tomorrow is Cinco de Mayo, the holiday commemorating General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguin (Who? We only vaguely know.) Historical logistics aside, we have always liked Cinco de Mayo because, much like the 4th of July, it's very easy to remember the date. Oh, and also because of tequila! And guacamole! And, especially, Mexican wrestling, although, again, we're not sure if that's actually part of the holiday or just an added bonus that seems to get tacked on to all of our nights out. In any event, we're not the only people who feel this way—a whole bunch of bars and restaurants are out to celebrate, too, and we've taken the liberty of choosing a few that are worth stopping by.

Teqa
This newly opened Gramercy Mexican spot has some pricey seating options ($100-$150) for their big night, but it's probably worth the cash, because they've somehow managed to book both former A.C. Slater Mario Lopez and Real Housewife Kelly Killoren Bensimon to host the evening's festivities, in which margaritas are served by the pitcher. Doors open at noon, and there's an agave-harvesting demo in the afternoon, should you not be able to reserve a spot and a brush with C-list television glory.
443 3rd Avenue, 212-213-3223

Ofrenda
Starting at noon and going until Saze de Mayo, Ofrenda is hosting an outdoor "puestos de comida" (that's an open air market, gringo), featuring guacamole, ice pops, tamales, agues frescos (horchata!), and…cotton candy, plus indoors, tequila-heavy cocktails, live music, and, best of all, Mexican lucha libre wrestlers! We don't know exactly where there's room for them to wrestle, but are willing to find out.
113 7th Avenue South, 212-924-2305

Virgil's Real Barbecue
While a Times Square BBQ joint may not be your first thought for a place to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, we're mentioning it because the restaurant has put together something called a "Bucket of Mexico," (two Negro Modelos, two Pacificos, and two Coronas, $30), which isn't actually that exciting but has a great name. There are other specials like the "Muy Caliente Margarita" with habanero-infused tequila and dishes like shrimp relleno ($11) and chicken enchiladas ($16).
152 West 44th Street, 212-921-9494

Rosa Mexicano
One of the city's largest and most English-friendly Mexican restaurants has a borderline-constitutional duty to throw a Cinco de Mayo blowout, and all three of the city's Rosas are up to the task, with music, pinatas and otherwise festive decorations, and a whole slew of special tequila cocktails ($9-14), including the new "French Margarita," made with Premium tequila, Grand Marnier, and lime juice. Expect a handful of menu additions to the already all-Mexican offerings.
1063 1st Avenue, 212-753-7407; 61 Columbus Avenue, 212-977-7700; 9 East 18th Street, 212-533-3350

El Parador Cafe
Does the prospect of hundreds of drunken, screaming revelers spilling margaritas on your feet not appeal? Try a slightly more refined celebration at El Parador Cafe, tucked away alongside the Lincoln Tunnel. It claims to be the city's oldest Mexican restaurant (it opened in 1959) and has a loungey, romantic vibe (no lucha libre here). They're doing a three-course. $35 prix-fixe dinner, with dishes like roasted corn soup with lump crab meat and achiote and sour orange grilled snapper.
325 East 34th Street, 212-679-6812

Vamos
Last year this Gramercy restaurant packed in some 1000 partiers, and this year they're hoping for even more, with an all-out blowout featuring a 10-piece big Latin band, "spinning samurai" DJ Tetsu (we don't know what samurais have to do with Cinco de Mayo but hey!), plus they're setting up extra tequila and margarita stations throughout the space to limit the crush at the main bar. Once you're good and sloshed, order tacos directly from chefs at an open-kitchen taco bar.
348 1st Avenue, 212-368-7730

People's Republic of Brooklyn
While normally this casual Carroll Gardens hangout doles out New Orleans-style fare, on Thursday's they're offering pulled pork tacos, BBQ chicken tacos, and nachos with all the fixings, totally for free (until they run out, which might happen fast). They're also running a two-for-one Corona special all night, which will hopefully last longer than the free nachos.
247 Smith Street, Brooklyn, 718-522-6100

Nuevo Mexico
It's a double-whammy of a celebration for Park Slope's Nuevo Mexico, which is also celebrating their second anniversary in the neighborhood. They'll have a live band starting at 7, an an extra-long happy hour (until midnight) that sees margarita pitchers going for $10 and tequila shots for $4.50, and, because no party is complete without them, free Jell-O shots and other giveaways.
489 5th Avenue, Brooklyn, 718-832-0050

Le Poisson Rouge:Culture blog Mex and the City is throwing a late night "Hyper Mex Dance party" to celebrate "Cinco de Gallo" at this Greenwich Village club. DJs Uproot Andy and Geko Jones will bring a mix of "electro folklore, digital cumbia, and tropical space disco" with special guest performances by Mariachi del Pueblo and the Tijuana-based electronic music act Los Macuanos, who will make their first appearance in New York. A "fierce dance party" is promised in this celebration of "contemporary Mexican culture in New York," with live "visuals" by MPeach! $10 gets you in and the party rages from 11 p.m. until 4 a.m., at which point everybody's gonna get laid, or whatever the word for that is in Spanish.
128 Bleeker Street, (212) 228-4854