Michael Bay apparently wants to give George Lucas a run for his money when it comes to the title of "destroyer of your youth." After informing the world that the heroes in the upcoming Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles reboot he is producing are actually a bunch of aliens, not mutants, the boom-boom-and-bosom-loving director has gone and made things worse. But it isn't his fault, he says. Blame the studio, he says. Or just refuse to see the movie, we say.
What we were we ranting about? Oh, yeah: Bay took to his official online forums today to tell the world that this time around the green guys you grew up loving are just the Ninja Turtles. Which we guess makes sense as they are apparently no longer either mutant or teenaged. Writes Bay:
Paramount marketing changed the name. They made the title simple. The characters you all remember are exactly the same, and yes they still act like teenagers. Everything you remember, why you liked the characters, is in the movie. This script is being developed by two very smart writers, with one of the original creators of Ninja Turtles. They care VERY MUCH about making this film for the fans. Everyone on this team cares about the fans. Just give them a chance. Jonathan the director, is a major fan of the whole franchise. HE'S NOT GOING TO LET YOU DOWN.
Because you know that MICHAEL BAY has no sway with those studios! Anyway, sadly Bay may be speaking the truth when he says the people making this movie really care about the fans and staying true to the original. If you've ever gone back and tried to rewatch the original TMNT television show you've probably realized that it was just an incredibly crass giant commercial for toys. Really awesome toys. And videogames. And bedsheets. And whether or not the new movie's heros are either teenaged or mutant, we're sure the new flick will be a great giant commercial, too. Just one we won't be spending our money on.
Luckily, we'll always have the memory of going to see the original opening day at the Anjelica (it was an independent movie! True story!) But one other thought? This new title is really going to screw up the theme song:
